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I watched a TV Series called Étoile. It’s about ballet (I don’t understand ballet).
Étoile
The TV series, that is.
An Anglo-French production, focusing on two ballet companies – one in New York and one in Paris, the series relates the story of these institutions trying to save their dwindling patronage by swapping talent between the two companies.
I liked it. It was quirky, funny and had some good actors in it. It apparently didn’t get the audience that it was hoped for and given the high cost of filming between New York and Paris, along with the large set pieces and ensemble cast, the series was cancelled after just one series.
But I enjoyed it nonetheless.
Oh you like a bit of dance?
Well. Not really, no. I liked the characterisations, I liked the story, the scenery and the actors. But when it comes to dance, ballet, interpretive er… interpretations, then I’m afraid it leaves me just a bit cold.
I understand some of the performing arts. You can’t go wrong with a good clown act (Charlie Caroli), a good magic act (Paul Daniels) or a good ventriloquist (Ray Alan). I fully understand those: what they’re supposed to be, what they’re supposed to do and the effect that they’re supposed to have.
I’ve never understood dance. Any form of dance: be it ballet, ballroom or break-dancing. It has no effect whatsoever on me, unlike (for example) a good piece of music. A good piece of music can elicit tears, laughter, goosebumps, shudders etc. Dance, not at all.
The ballet
I know what ballet is and I’ve seen it both live and on the telly. Admittedly, I haven’t watched a great deal of it, and I am more familiar with the music. And that’s the bit I can’t tie together: the music with the movement. Watching the ballet Swan Lake, for example. For me, it’s just a load of people running around waving their arms in the air, to an awesome bit of Tchaikovsky. The music is brilliant in itself, but I just can’t relate the movements of the ballet dancers to the the music, or what is supposed to be happening in the story somehow. What is it supposed to be? Are they supposed to be swans or something? I don’t know…
Ballet in person
I went (in person, no less) to the Mariinsky Theatre in St. Petersburg a few years ago. The ballet was Swan Lake and I read the (English) programme from cover to cover. Several times. The programme described the scenes in the ballet, what was happening and who was in them. I was just incapable of tying it together: I just couldn’t correlate the jigging around and arm flapping to either the described actions, or the music. Absolutely no idea. No doubt the dancers danced it beautifully (I wouldn’t know!). The rest of the audience seemed to think so, anyway.
I was much more interested in the theatre itself: at the time, it was a beautiful not-very-well-maintained building with a good deal of character and quite a strong smell of stale cigarette smoke. It was not unpleasant.
En pointe
Yes, I’m aware of famous ballet dancers: I even have a signed copy of Dame Darcey Bussell’s ballet-photo-biography book. Lovely photos. I know who Fonteyn, Nureyev, Nijinski, Pavlova (love her pudding), Baryshnikov and of course Dame Darcey are. I am aware of all of them and have even dived in to some of their careers. Now those bits were interesting. 😁
Despite knowing that, the dance still makes no sense.
To quote the Ballet Directories “10 Most Influential Dancers of all Time”:
Why These Dancers Matter: These legends weren’t just technically brilliant – they were innovators, risk-takers and storytellers. They challenged traditions, broadened ballet’s appeal and brought their own voices to a historically rigid art form. Many of them transcended cultural and political boundaries, proving that dance is a universal language.
Universal language it might be, but it’s still one that I am unable to understand. It’s gobbledygook to me.
Dance away
It’s not just ballet, it’s almost any form of dance… with the odd exception of ballroom! I can almost relate the movements of ballroom dancers to the music. Almost. And not all the time.
Interpretive dance. e.g.: a person in tights on their own with a silk scarf, flapping around to some music. I have far less understanding of that form of the performing arts than any other. I have absolutely no idea what goes on there. None whatsoever.
Top of the Pops
The greater majority of “modern dance” that I have borne witness to over the years is of course, Top of the Pops (TOTP). Up until 1982, TOTP featured a dance troupe in one form or another, ranging from Pan’s People and Ruby Flipper, through to Legs & Co. and Zoo (that’s what the dance troupe were called, by the way). Consisting of a mix of people over the years, the troupes danced to some of the charting records, or tracks of the time.
These were choreographed dances. The troupe would usually move together in choreographer Flick Colby’s interpretation of the track they were dancing to.
On the odd occasion, one of the members would be given a “breakout” dance, away from the main troupe. Still choreographed, but slightly different. The greater majority of that made no sense to me either.
In addition to the choreographed movements, the troupe would be dressed in what was supposedly an appropriate costume to reflect the record they were dancing to. Something else that mystified (but entertained) the viewer. It absolutely and unequivocally mystified me and continues to do so to this day.
Band choreography
Then there are the bands on TOTP. The boy bands of the 1990’s, the girl bands with their choreographed in-time movements. Was that better to watch than a band just “free-styling it” (as it were)? Not in my opinion, anyway. I didn’t think it any better, but it was certainly no worse. It did seem to be a thing in the 1990-2000’s.
Choreography/ers
There are many famous choreographers and many types of choreography. From ballet dancers to drones to K-Pop, usually anything that has some sort of co-ordinated movement to it will have been choreographed by somebody or other.
Even I have done a bit of choreography in my lifetime. I’ve choreographed marching sequences for the Girls Venture Corps and marching band display sequences that had them marching up and down, and threading through themselves in a plethora of timed precision and splendour. And I understood that. I could correlate the music to the movement with no issues whatsoever.
Regardless, whether it’s a ballet, or a boy band, I brain is still missing that vital bit of information that allows me to correlate the relationship between movement and music.
TL;DR
I don’t understand ballet or modern dance. I am therefore an emotionless heathen.
